I’m the kind of person:
¾ Who you will most likely find annoying
¾ Who sometimes gets depressed and doesn’t know why
¾ Who sometimes thinks she’s depressed but really is just bored
¾ Who thinks her pet dog is in fact smarter than a significant number of the Earth’s population
¾ Who kind of hates people
¾ Who isn’t ashamed to admit that she loves musicals
¾ Who is sort of ashamed of loving musicals, but gets over it and admits it
¾ Who thinks God is in fact a strong black woman, and that She’s Oprah
¾ Who thinks she isn’t made to live in this world
¾ Who hopes she’ll die young because she’s too afraid even to try to live
¾ Who doesn’t care what you think of these statements you’re reading, but sort of does
¾ Who thinks God screwed up and sent her in the wrong decade
¾ Who thinks it’s pointless to thank God for something you’ve achieved
¾ Who thinks that people should stop trying to convince her there is no Santa Claus
¾ Who thinks her glasses are in fact trying to kill her
¾ Who believes she has 2 sometimes 3 imaginary friends
¾ Who just wants a pony for her birthday
¾ Who hates mushrooms
¾ Who considers all children evil
¾ Who sees elevators as despicable tools of the devil
¾ Who likes sci-fi stuff even if she’s a girl
¾ Whose favorite movie is secretly Die hard – even if she’s a girl
¾ Who has too much spare time on her hands and writes this stupid list.
